JOKIC IS THE JOKER, JUST NOT THAT ONE

Because his name begins with “Jok,” Serbian basketball superstar Nikola Jokic has been christened “The Joker” by American announcers. This nickname fucking sucks. “The Joker” is the main Batman villain (Batman is a man who dresses up like a bat to solve crime in many popular comic books), a clown man who thinks crime is… Continue reading JOKIC IS THE JOKER, JUST NOT THAT ONE

PLEASE DO HALF OF THE WORK OF WRITING MY CONTENT VOL 2: JIMMY BUTLER AND STRATEGIC EJECTIONS

Hello! In case you didn’t know, writing is hard. You gotta come up with ideas, then come up with words to serve those ideas and honestly man it sucks. Sometimes, when you’re as famous as I am, you sidestep the first thing by having your readers send in questions you can answer. You do this… Continue reading PLEASE DO HALF OF THE WORK OF WRITING MY CONTENT VOL 2: JIMMY BUTLER AND STRATEGIC EJECTIONS

Chris Paul Goes Out Tumbling

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KMpoqbkPvzo Mark Jones’s voice is peaked the fuck out, befitting the last few posessions of an extraordinarily tight Game Seven. “HOUSTON WITH THE BALL AND UNDER A MINUTE TO GO!” You’re juiced, he’s juiced, we’re all juiced.  Then, something miraculous happens. Eric Gordon, back to the basket at half court, protecting his dribble, makes light… Continue reading Chris Paul Goes Out Tumbling

PLEASE DO HALF OF THE WORK OF WRITING MY CONTENT VOL 1:

PLEASE DO HALF OF THE WORK OF WRITING MY CONTENT VOL 1:  Hello! In case you didn’t know, writing is hard. You gotta come up with ideas, then come up with words to serve those ideas and honestly man it sucks. Sometimes, when you’re as famous as I am, you sidestep the first thing by… Continue reading PLEASE DO HALF OF THE WORK OF WRITING MY CONTENT VOL 1:

Mark, George, and Me.

https://twitter.com/gifdsports/status/1296641268785741825?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw%7Ctwcamp%5Etweetembed%7Ctwterm%5E1296641268785741825%7Ctwgr%5E&ref_url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.radio.com%2Fsports%2Fnba%2Fformer-nba-coach-george-karl-slams-mark-jackson-on-twitter In addition to the many wins, losses and plays of note, this week’s NBA news cycle also featured a Beef between irritable two older men. Mark Jackson was on TV, where he said, “Hey, everyone said Melo was bad at defense, but actually he’s not.” This statement, probably incorrect, so Van Gundy said man… Continue reading Mark, George, and Me.

Stupid Shot That Disproves Causation Brings Joy, Terror to Author

There are times when I see something happen in a basketball game so deeply irrational that even when it happens in service of the team I root for (The Portland Trail Blazers), I am haunted by an undercurrent of unnerved loathing for the very process of reality itself, of the fucking random nonsense that drives… Continue reading Stupid Shot That Disproves Causation Brings Joy, Terror to Author